Is there expert help to deal with Parental Alienation in the court system?

by Rick Nischalke on April 21, 2012

If you’re involved in a child custody case involving parental alienation or parental alienation syndrome this post could be very important to you.

Any attorney that’s been involved in a high conflict divorce involving children will be fully aware of the dynamic of PA even if they’ve never heard of the actual term. Although many judges are reluctant to accept parental alienation as a legal term, every experienced attorney & judge has seen a vicious ex-spouse attempt to destroy the relationship of a targeted parent with their children.

This is where an outside consultant can be very beneficial. They can help to protect you and your children in a variety of ways. To begin with they are usually quite current with case precedence on this topic. They’ve also seen what works best and just as importantly, what is totally ineffective in these types of cases. In addition they can often provide resources that your attorney will need to prove your case in court.

Please remember though that even with the help of a skilled & educated professional there are no guarantees of success in the courtroom. Judges are people. Like everyone else, there are good judges and bad judges. And unfortunately they can do just about anything they want to in their courtroom. Some of you already know exactly what I’m talking about. But that doesn’t negate the fact that you should do everything possible to obtain a favorable outcome for you and your children.

At first glance some of you will look at this as an additional expense. Although that could end up being the case, often times exactly the opposite is true. Many times a skilled consultant is able to uncover the truth much faster than your attorney could by themselves. In those cases it could actually save you a great deal in legal fees because there will be less litigation to prove what is happening and to remedy the situation.

Parental alienation is a horrible form of child abuse. Every effort should be made to prevent it from happening at all. When that’s not possible, it needs to be stopped from progressing to the point that children lose a loving parent. You will need every tool and resource available to help you in this battle with parental alienation. The key is to be proactive instead of reactionary. If you wait until you feel like your losing you’ve probably already lost…

Here is an article from one of the foremost authorities in this field. His name is Joseph Goldberg. Here is his perspective on the value of a consultant in these types of cases:

Parental Alienation and Children Exhibiting Visitation Refusal Behavior 


Rick Nischalke
Keeping Families Connected

{ 21 comments… read them below or add one }

1 Lisa December 9, 2012 at 6:07 pm

Help! My husband has already brainwashedy 14 year old and is fearlessly working on my 10 year old son. I’m am scared as time passes. He has temporary custody of my children and I am currently on a shelter. He somehow beyond belief convinced the mediator that I was totally unfit. I feel hopeless. He filed a ridiculous DVRO on me nd we went to trial. The judge found there was no evidence of his claims and did not grant a permanent order. She even went so far as to say he was acting in parental alienation but she is not our family law judge and the mediator refuses to look at evidence and take a deeper look at my desperate pleas. My little boy has stopped telling me he loves me and acts frightened of me

2 cheryl morris December 10, 2012 at 12:28 pm

Hi, where are you folks located? My daughter is being alienated from her son by her ex who has done alot of damage to the point that her son will not come home since a week ago last friday. She has legal & physical custody but doesn’t know what to do, since the police don’t enforce such things when the child is 16. Can you help? Thanks, Cheryl

3 anw1976 January 5, 2013 at 3:29 pm

I am going through the same thing. My 10 yr old daughter hated going to her fathers house until August when he received temp custody of both her and her 16 yr old sister. My 10 yr old was once a mamamas girl and always wanted me to the point of getting up in the middle of the night to get her from her best friends or cousins house because she missed me and wanted to come home. This has even happened since she has been in his custody on his weekend. No way was i telling her i wouldnt come get her regardless of who’s weekend it was. She never calls me when he is around but calls all the time from a friends phone when she is with them. She sd she is scared to ask to use his phone to call me. She has become very nervpus and anxious at times. He kept them from me for 5 weeks because i wouldnt allow them to come get the rest of their clothes from my house that i had to go out and buy since he took all their clothes to his house so she didnt look like an orphan when sge was with me due to always being sent with crappy clothes. My 16 yr ild is free to do whatever she wants including laying ouof school, failing every class and staying out all hours of the night. I had a sorry attorney and judge to not see through the sperm donor that never did or cared anything about them even the 12 years we were married. I was the only parent they ever had til i remarried and even my girls have told people that the stepdad had been more of a father than their real one had ever been. Now to prove the alienation and praying that the counselor we will begin seeing this week sees through to the truth and brings my babies back home to the one parent that has been there for them every single day of their life And to add one more important point is that i have my 10 yr old in a good christian private school to avoid the problems ive had with my 16 yr old and the sperm donor is planning on taking her out of that school. So my family is out $5000 and my daughter is out the only positive daily influence she has.

4 joe January 22, 2013 at 1:03 pm

I have not been able to talk with my daughter in over a year 8 yrs ago
Her mother moved out of state my little girl was my best friend shes 14 now and hates me I talked to her last halloween she never told me she hated me but now she does

5 mambear January 28, 2013 at 1:42 am

I am losing my mind…When do you stop fighting?

6 Joseph Goldberg January 31, 2013 at 8:22 am

If you need the help of a parental alienation consultant. Please call me at 407-401-7175 or write to me at pas
You can also visit my website at
Check out my Facebook page – Parental Alienation Consulting Services

7 ginyarbrough2002 March 17, 2013 at 6:05 pm

my ex and his girlfriend have a new baby and she has become verbally abusive to my 9 year old little girl her fahter has sent her to stay with me a few times only to take her back in to the abusive home as soon has he has to let me regisrter her for school. i was injured at work over two years ago and still fighting workers comp so i cant afford a lawyer i dont know what to do he with holds all cntact with my kids for months on end until the school or some one starts complianing about behavior issues then he sends them here long enough to smooth things over and takes them back it may be six or eight months bvefor he lets me even talk to them on the phone does any one know how to get help i have tried children services and legal aid and csea no one has any ansewers

8 Halimah Bint Rose April 9, 2013 at 2:41 pm

I’m in Australia. This is exactly what has happened to me, every fine point, they are even my same terms of expressions! What I can’t understand is how professionals can be so blind. If anyone cares to connect the dots in my case, it is plain and simple to see. The problem as in the article, people aren’t interested in the whole truth, ease, convenience and their own safety. My case has been put in the ‘too hard box’. I’ve not seen my 10 year old for 9 months, all with permission from the court even though allegations against me are not proven but there is proof against the father. This is being ignored. Again as in the article, the father only needs a little more time. Stay strong people.

9 Stressed Abouta Narcissist May 14, 2013 at 1:34 am

Hello, if anyone here wants more information and to be a member of a group that is exhibiting a movement of change in legislation in federal law regarding these issues, please contact protective parents association and Mothers of lost children. We are a group of women and or parents that have lost custody to abusers molesters and or narcissists. Thank you.

10 Stressed Abouta Narcissist May 14, 2013 at 1:37 am

P.S. Mothers of lost children is currently in DC participating in the BMCC (Battered Mothers Custody Conference) and is marching in protest for the 10th year about loss of custody to men that abuse. We lobby for change, federal oversight hearings for CPS and Family Law Courts. We believe CPS needs a RECONSTRUCTION from A-Z ground up! Check us out on Facebook – Mothers of Lost Children, California Protective Parents Association, and National Safe Kids Network, or Court Watch.

11 Brandon May 18, 2013 at 11:07 pm

Hi, I recently put together a short film for a competition entitle the Child Priority, I want to do more work in this…. please support my efforts, and if there is anyone who would like to share with me for future prodcutions I can record by phone or by skype and haver server space on the web to accept submitted files also…

here is the clip,

12 Kristi July 21, 2013 at 7:28 pm

wow, i feel for all of u parents that r enduring this. my husband and i have been married now for almost 4 yrs and he separated from his exwife in 2007 and they had 2 kids. i knew from the beginning it was going to be bad. and i couldn’t have even imagined the half at that point. PAS is very real and didn’t know how malicious parents could be. within a month of the separation she called CPS numerous times to report sexual abuse to their 3 yr old daughter at that time and neglect for their 18 month old special needs son. and they believed her for SOOOOO LONG! it took us almost 3 yrs to make our case, and it was a long, expensive uphill battle. She eventually made her own bed that she HAD to lie in. The court took custody from her after a barrage of case workers, psychologists, and police detectives got in front of the judge and told them what was really going on. She had even run off with the kids and moved 5 hours away at the time. His kids wouldn’t talk to him for the longest and she had her daughter brainwashed that her daddy had hurt her. it was sick. in the end my husband gained sole custody of his kids and she was granted supervised permanent visitation. PAS is real and finally becoming more recognized, u just have to have the will to fight, because its not easy

13 SBA September 4, 2013 at 7:52 pm

I am in desperate need of a leading authority on PAS in Ohio – preferably Dayton / Cincinnati area. Reading these comments is frighteningly familiar.

14 shane October 7, 2013 at 12:16 am

Im involved in a criminal case accused of child molest. my exwife has trying to get sole custody for 3 yrs. i sent our son back to live with his mother he threatened to kill me, girlfrfiend, and her daugther. mind you he was 9 yrs old. aprox 1 month later after he was sent to his mothers i was being investigated for child abuse and neglect. i was cleared of allegations. 2 to 3 weeks after being cleared i was accused of child molest. eventually charged. after reading reports from dcs and police department, plus 2 depostions done on son and mother, reports and depositions contridict each other. was obvious my son was coached and menipulated for custody purposes.

15 russell Bullock October 29, 2013 at 2:51 pm

how do i order the “PAS package .

16 Tricia April 24, 2014 at 1:29 am

My name is Tricia I believe I am a victim of p a s, I am a very proud mother of an 12 year old daughter, I have been with my husband for 21 years, married 17. He Has been physical and emotional abusive with me from way beyond I can remember, I was. A stay at home mom for about 9 years, I went back to work about 3 years ago after my husband lost his job, and his self employment wasnt supporting the family, reason he was self employed he was a daily marijuana user and would not be able to pass a drug test.. I never had a life outside of the home meaning I didn’t socialize with friends etc.. My mother had mental issues about 5 years ago.. He had me choose between him and my daughter or my family.. I chose him and my daughter, but the turmoil and fighting would still be overwhelming, fights infront of my daughter where weekly occurrences even daily, with fits of rage breaking things and even physical at times, he has waken her out of sleep to take her to his parents. On several occasions.. After I started working things had started to get worse, I was not home 24/7 I was enjoying getting out and having a life outside of home.. I started to feel good about myself, about 2 years ago I lost weight, started tanning, which made him jealous, but I still only went to work.. But started getting insanely jealous accusing me of affairs, secrets etc.. He started telling my daughter 10 year old i was a slut that I had a boyfriend and i ruined the marraige. Then our fiances were a mess because of him not having steady work.. He would tell my daughter that I blew his money, I’m worthless etc.. I started to hate him.. But stayed because I was scared, and didnt want to hurt my daughter, I started working nights while he worked daylight hours.. So she became his confidant, his buddy, I left for 2 weeks in 2012, and stayed at my freind Kim’s, she has an austic son.. Which they have been to my home several times.. He begged me to come home he would change.. From that day on kim was no good and My daughter suddenly became afraid of her autistic son.. She started shunning out even or neighbors daughters which they are like sisters.. Seems like everyone we did things with at one time.. She wanted no parts of.. Then he would flip out if I would talk on the phone with kim and Michel, we went to marraige counseling, she labeled him as a control freak.. Asked y I stayed.. Same reason my daughter loves her dad.. But then she started absorbing his hatred towards me, I would ask her to clean her room or pick up after herself and he would yell at me for barking orders at her.. I then started to realize this is not right, no respect from either.. She started calling texting her dad in the mornings and tell him I wouldn’t get up with her or she packed her own lunch, he would say that I am a bad mom and she agreed, he would say things like ur daughter even hates you.. I said that she is mimicking his behavior.. My Gosh it had gotten to the point I couldn’t even talk when they were watching tv I had to ask if I could talk.. She put passwords on her iPod, phone, ipad.. I had lost control and total respect.. I asked her if she hated me and she wouldn’t answer.. I cried she showed no emotion.. I asked for a divorce i felt like i was in prison and that I had to so I can have my relationship back with my daughter.. I said to make as easy,, shared custody.. I came home from work Friday 3/7 to an empty house and no daughter.. He trashed the home took my daughter everything that would make her comfortable to come back, he said that he did it because I am a bad mom.. I have never so much as raise my voice to her. When i tried to do 1 on 1 things i would get in trouble, weather it be taking her to lunch or buying her a lipgloss there was hell to pay.. but he could do and buy her anything.. She says she wants to live with him, he says he has to force her to call me and see me.. I believe he has her so brainwashed. On the few visits I had she has cried and says she misses me but once shes back shes cold again.. But if he’s there observing she’s like a robot and won’t even make eye contact with me.. and she had been sleeping on the couch the last few months with him., and if we went anywhere together they would walk ahead of me holding hands.. His parents helped him move everything out says looking out my daughter what’s best for her.. They are staying at his parents.. He filed fir divorce and sole custody.. I’m not a bad mom for not walking my daughter to school ( school is block and a half) from our home, or packing her a lunch. Sorry this is so long, it’s 5 am couldn’t sleep I found your site.. Shes refusing to call or rven respond to any texts.. When I do talk to her, I cry and she cried.. then i get slammed for making her upset.. days laying a guilt trip .
help point me in the right direction before I loose my mind

17 Alton Thomas August 24, 2014 at 9:40 pm

I have been alienated from my daughter. In 2007, my wife filed for divorce. Th eevry day I got the notice in the mail, she had told the day care center not to let me have her due to filing the divorce. There were no court orders restricting me form getting her. I had dropped her pff the same morning. After seeing the notice for divorce in the mail, I went to get her. That is when I was told i couldn’t. by the time I went and got a deputy to help me, they had called my wife to come get her. She then disappeared for a few days. She thought she could stay in a shelter for women. Our preacher took her there. In order to receive any assistance and be able to stay there, she had to file a DVO against me. In court, the judge did not care what had happened or that it was illegal for the day center to do that to me, and for my wife to do the same. Not even the preacher, who helped in this farce got in trouble. Even the bank where we had all our accounts did wrong. They allowed her access to my private accounts and one I had for my daughter. My name was all that was on it. They claim because she is my daughters mom, they could break federal law and allow her to get the money. Things for the most part have gotten worse. For about a year things settle down, we even got back together during that time. Then she wanted me out as soon as I became disabled. She even used an evet that had happened to my oldest daughter by my 1st wife. Something she had allowed her boyfriend to do to my daughter, was turned to appear as if I had done it to her. The judge believed her and again I am alienated from my little girl. Based on lies. And I am financially raped every month for child support and 42% of any amount she writes on paper that she had to pay for child care so she can work. Also I can not call or go to the school to find out if she goes to the before and after school care program that I pay 42% of each month also. I can’t talk to her doctor who believe U am what my ex said I am.No lawyers in this area will stand against this judge. No one will run against her for re-election. Everyone is afraid of her. Even the cop who should have arrested the day care operator for PA said he couldn’t without the judge ordering it. He said it would be a cold day in Hell before teh judge would allow that. He couldn’t take a chance and lose his job because he was already giving his ex 75% of everything he made and had lost so much before that. What am I supposed to do? I have no one at all. I have no home, no money very little food stamps to eat on. What do I do?

18 Theresa Matteson December 3, 2014 at 11:54 am

I have put together a video regarding “11 Custody Myths That Place Children in Danger”. It is very eye-opening as parental alienation is abuse and children are placed with these abusive parents every day.

Please share!

19 keyanna Landry February 27, 2015 at 8:04 pm

I’m going through the same thing but different I pray tht someone would listen its just sad

20 keyanna Landry February 27, 2015 at 8:26 pm

Its heart breaking for me , my son father has visitation rights an so much has happen to my son , My son is twelve years old he’s cutting up in school , I back in fourth to court , my son had a gun pointed to his head while he wuz asleep , at the father girl friend , his stepson did it , They didn’t even tell me me , I had to find out thts why its good to talk to ur child, my son wuz bit by a pitbul his lip wuz hanging an they rush him to new Orleans an didn’t say a word, I found out by his girl friend he has a charge carnal knowledgeof a juvenile 4 cunts to a felony! My hair is falling out piece by piece or when I comb it , I’m Jus crying for mercy , the courts still gave him visitation ,my son is where’s glasses now because he under distress , he is not the father I almost died having my son , he fraud is name on the birth certificate , his mother Is the one brainwashing my child when he go on visit with them they talk about me the whole time ,they are jealous of our relationship, he know he’s not the father thts why they are doing this,they lie in court on , he lie to the judge about everything, I been wanting to tell my story, An I thought people would listen , but I get no help, I’m trying to get lawyer but money is tight cause I have four boys, on begging for help, I almost lost my mind so much has happen with my son an I ! I jus don’t want to lose my son for their stupidity, it hurts bad! People need to watch why they do to a child of god! they will have to answer to this one day, an it will come back on them 2000 times more! Thanks for hearing my story, I’m about to get on my knees an pray an ask god to move these people out of our lives! I rebuke the devil in the name of Jesus ,ima start praying harder an harder until god do something an reveal the truth! Thanks

21 margaret March 24, 2016 at 11:39 am

I have been alienated from my 3 sons for 12 years. My ex husband and I were married for 23 years. He was abusive, controlling and always accusing me of having affairs. My job as his wife was to support him through college, dental school, a relocation for him to do his residency.
we were a team working hard to achieve our goals. He turned 40, bought a porsche that he parked in the garage on an oriental rug. He even had a mouse pad with a picture of him and the car on it! He hired a personal trainer and then dissapeared for “business meetings” out of town. The wife is always the last to know, right?
I wanted to stop working and be a stay at home mom for my sons, then ages 8,8,and5. The abuse got worse because I was no longer earning money. He opened his own practice that became extremely sucessfull. We aggreed to shared custody and tried to make a good transition. He was furious that he had to pay child support and alimony and not having controll. He had his 20 year old girlfriend call CPS and made false allegations of neglect. He hired a child phycologist , a hired gun, to write to the court saying I was not fit. I have gone to court almost every year since 2004 to fight for even just contact, but, he can afford the legal fees and I can’t. I even have to pay him child support and he makes millions. MY twins are now 20 years old and in college and want nothing to do with me. My youngest son is now almost 18.
The courts need to recognize that this is child abuse. I wouldn’t wish this on any mother or father to endure. It has been my worst nightmare and I am at the end of my rope. The case is in New Jersey. I am desperate. Can anyone help?

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